JF Ptak Science Books Quick Post
Well, here I am, uncertain about posting this odd piece about an odd subject, oddly written in odd style, with odd logic, all wrapped up in a big flat ball of buttery odd.
At first I thought that this was a true Outsider adventure--that, or a work of a somewhat deep personal dialog that should have stayed deep, and private. In the end I've decided that it is a work of Speculative Outsider Fiction, though the subject may be real, but the presentation is purely performance. I think.
The work was written by "Prof" Clarence F. Miles, and pertains to horse jaw bones made into a tambourine-type instrument, and has some connection to Stephen Foster1.
The History and Romance of "Rattling" Musical Jaw Bones, (1936), "First and only edition, Bulletin No. 1, being the third part of a history of jaw bones" is boasted on one of the sub-title pages, even though it is stated immediately afterwards that "this is my first history of Jaw Bones". This is an early display of this logic--there are for example the following section headings: "The Last Half of the Second and Last Section of Supplement No. 3" which of course followed the final section called "Second and Last Section of Supplement No. 3" both of which are preceded by a chapter head reading "Third Supplement to the First and Only Edition of Bulletin No 1 which is my book the history and romance of rattling jaw bones"! All of those sections fight each other for space in just over three pages. This pamphlet contains powerful displays of such battle construction made even more remarkable by the great brevity of the work, which is only 36 pages, about 10 of which are repetitious bits and chatter.
There are also numerous non-sequitur forays into unchartered waterless waters where the unexpected and the unconnected are frequently obtained and connected by brute force:
"The above evidence is conclusive proof that Mr. Charles Darwin wasted the five years of his life between the years
1831 and 1836 that he spent as naturalist on the surveying ship H. M. S. Beagle on a voyage around the world
and that the research work performed upon rattling jaw bones by the Stephen Collins Foster Institute of Rattling
Musical Jaw Bones has knocked Mr. Darwin's famous or infamous theory into a cocked hat and the cocked hat
can be found in the middle of next week. Deny it if you can."
At the end of the work, and after much repetition of the title and the necessity for this history of jaw bones, the author
states in the third to last paragraph that he hadn't even begun to write the history of jaw bones in his history of jawbones
book. "From now on I start writing jaw bones at the exact point where jaw bone science ends and the jaw bone skill
begins", which is a great line. He continues, "I will raise jaw bones to their rightful and exalted station and watch my
style, speed and dust in accomplishing it".
There's more, but I think I've now exhausted my interest, though I do salute Mr. Miles for his great dexterity.
Notes:
1. "The quijada, charrasca, or jawbone (in English), is an idiophone percussion instrument made from the jawbone of a
donkey, horse or mule cattle, producing a powerful buzzing sound. The jawbone is cleaned of tissue and dried to
make the teeth loose and act as a rattle."--Wikipedia
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